Raising Boys n Barbells

This past week I turned 36! I can’t help but look back and reflect on my first five years in my 30s, realizing how much I have changed and grown over the years. In just the last five years, I have gotten married, changed jobs, bought two homes, survived a pandemic, and became a Mom of two boys.  However, it is not just the big changes in my life that are worth noting but even more importantly, it is the small shifts that have had the biggest impact. Fitness and wellness have always played a huge role in my life yet they have both evolved greatly over the years as I gain more experience, learn what works best for me, and adapt to the stage I’m currently at within adulthood.

Shift in my WHY – In my 20s, my focus may have been more centered around aesthetics, working out because of the way it made me look. It boosted my self-confidence for my nights out at the bar with friends and allowed me to fit into my skinny jeans and crop top from Abercrombie & Fitch (ironically my favorite pair of shorts today are my Abercrombie & Fitch  “Mom Shorts”. Nice job transitioning your style with the generation, A&F.). It was always my goal to get six-pack abs for summer vacation while living in my bathing suit at the beach; now I look at my abs in awe, amazed at how they carried my two children through pregnancy. As I transitioned into my 30s, especially when I became a Mom, being healthy was not only about looking my best but more importantly feeling my best. I wanted to show up to my job, for my partner, and now my children as my best-self with focus, energy, and strength. Prioritizing my health and wellness helps me to manage my stress and anxiety, gives me the strength and endurance to keep up with my children, and cultivates a positive mindset for myself and everyone around me.

Choose quality over quantity – It is sometimes hard not to compare your fitness to your pre-kid fitness when you used to train more frequently and be more consistent. I remember when I could fit in two workouts a day, cardio in the morning / weights in the evening, for a total of 2+ hours of exercise a day. I have to remind myself I was also sleeping 9+ hours every night, showered daily, and even went to the bathroom alone. There was definitely a season in my 30s where the only things I had capacity for was daily walks and the physicality of motherhood. That is okay – actually more than okay – physical activity will look different at different stages of your life. I have learned that when time limits you, the quality of your exercise is more important than the quantity. I now focus on fewer but more intentional and efficient workouts, no more than 45 minutes long, while also making sure to incorporate rest days to allow for recovery and extra quality time with my loved ones.

Incorporate less cardio, more strength training – I started running in college to help manage my anxiety levels and soon found myself addicted. I have completed 8+ full marathons and more half marathons than I can count. Endurance running was my thing after I was done playing sports; it gave me a goal to work towards, made me feel good, and kept me active. Although I still love the way that cardio makes me feel, as I have gotten older I have realized the importance of adding strength training into my routine. Women reach peak bone mass before the age of 30, which means that after 30, you begin to lose bone mass (which is a predisposing factor for osteoporosis); resistance training can help mitigate these effects. Not only will strength training strengthen your bones but I have also found it to be more effective in weight management resulting in lower body fat, increased lean muscle mass, and a faster metabolism. As a result, I have started to incorporate at least 4 days a week of weight training and get in my steps throughout the day for my main source of cardio. However, since cardio will always be my happy place, I still try to incorporate a energizing spin class at Cyclebar or a run outside along the beach. Cardio and weight training both have their benefits, so keep up with the routine that feels best for you.

Made nutrition a top priority – My motto used to be “I run so I can eat”; I always believed I could eat anything I wanted as long as I could run it off the next day. Unfortunately as you get older it is not that easy. Theoretically, if you want to lose weight, it is about 80 percent diet and 20 percent exercise. The easiest way for me to keep my nutrition in check has been through tracking my macros, ensuring I am planning ahead for balanced meals throughout the day and helping me be more aware of what I am eating (I do not believe in any of the fad diets out there!). I have also learned to prioritize breakfast, the most important meal of the day, often making eggs, bacon, avocado toast, and fruit. The biggest change I have made in my 30s regarding my nutrition is cooking my own meals. I have never been a good cook but have learned that you do not need to be a chef to make healthy, delicious food; I love looking online for new recipes to make myself and husband. It is important that I fuel my body with food that provides the energy I need to feel good but also that I enjoy the food I am eating and not deprive myself.

Focus on anti-aging and skin care – Skincare was the last thing on my mind in my younger years, often spending my time in tanning beds during the winters in Wisconsin and using oil to sun tan in the summer. It wasn’t until my late 20s when I was diagnosed with my first basal cell carcinoma to which I got a quick wake-up call. It is now my first priority to always be wearing sunblock or lotion with SPF, my sun glasses and/or hat, and finding shade when possible, especially since moving to California. I was lucky enough to have minimal acne growing up and got away with a skin care routine that only included a clean and clear face wash. However it wasn’t long into my 30s when I started noticing the impact of my decisions at a young age on the health of my skin. At the age of 30, cellular turnover usually occurs every 28 to 35 days, which might accumulate more dead skin cells and cause dullness. The skin also starts to lose collagen and elastin, causing fine lines, wrinkles, and under-eye circles. I now follow a skin care routine morning and night by FRE Skincare, products specializing in fighting acne and signs of aging for active woman.

Prioritize sleep –  So long are the all nighters out with friends or binging on Netflix, this girl is in bed no later than 9pm most nights, aiming for 7-8 hours a night. I used to be able to function on very little sleep but with the increase of responsibility I need sleep more than I ever have. It is also not as easy to get these days with little ones so whenever I get the chance, I am trying to stack up on my sleep. If I am choosing between waking up early for a workout or getting in an extra hour of sleep because I was up all night with my child, I will always choose sleep. It is my first priority above any other health habit I have.

Spend time alone – In my 20s I was a social butterfly constantly surrounding myself with friends and family and longed for a long-term relationship with someone to share my life with. Now I appreciate any time I get alone in order to fully decompress, reflect, and tune into myself. While fostering the relationships that make you happy is an important part of wellness, so is spending time alone to foster the most important relationship in your life. No matter your relationship status, it’s important to take yourself on dates during this decade. During your 30s, alone time is probably harder to make time for as you likely have more responsibilities at work and at home, whether it’s with a significant other, kids, roommates, or pets. But it’s also when you probably need alone time the most. Take yourself out for lunch, plan a solo trip, or even just spend an afternoon doing your favorite things. 

My approach to health and over-all wellbeing looks completely different in my 30s compared to what it was during my 20s; it has changed in a way that has made my 30s my best years yet. I wish I could tell my younger self all that I have learned over the years about what is truly important when it comes to fitness and wellness.

When it comes to your fitness and wellness, what do you wish you could tell your younger self?

36 Year Old Self,

ME